Ep. 47 – Anxiety

Hey, my beautiful friend. How are you? Today I am speaking about something that is happening to me that I thought you might be feeling. It’s anxiety, you know, I deal with it most mornings because of what I want to get done each day and dealing with my clients and just, you know, my thoughts. But today is like anxiety.

The charts because I am going on a 10 day vacation on a cruise with my husband, and I think this is the first time that we’ve gone away this long away from our businesses and you know, our home and our, everything that we have going on. I think for probably, God, it’s gotta be, 10 years, um, maybe longer. So anyhow, I’m dealing with that today.

But I thought that it would be a good subject to talk to you about because I know going through divorce you are dealing with a lot of anxiety as well. So anyhow. If you are ready, I am. Let’s get started today talking about anxiety.

Are you ready to create a life that’s better than ever before? We are Doreen Yaa and Jeff Wilson, and we are here to give you the strategies you need to create the life after divorce that you. And desire as partners, both in marriage and coaching. We use our expertise as well as our own personal experiences to help you make the next chapter of your life the best chapter.

So, first of all, how’s your summer going? I hope you’re having a great summer. Hope you’re getting out, doing some fun things. I’m sitting here complaining about going away for 10 days, and I’m really not complaining. It’s just, you know, leaving my business and leaving my home and, you know, things that are going out in the world.

I don’t know, it’s just kind of a, I don’t know. I, I prefer shorter little trips, but anyhow, this is something that, uh, we’ve committed to. We’re going and I’m sure it’s gonna be great. So many of the people that I represent as a divorce lawyer, of course, like I said, are going through anxiety, but for many, the major anxiety really hits when they’re finally divorced and they’re like, so now what?

You know, I get emails from people and so a lot of the coaching I do. Based around anxiety. It’s something that most of us deal with on a regular basis. I know for me, as I stated personally, I deal with anxiety a lot. It’s a lot better than it used to be. I can tell you that much. But I’ve had to work through what I’m gonna work with you today on or talk to you about, and I’ll tell you.

Stuff does work. So I can remember as far back as when I was a teenager, waking up in the morning and immediately having this pit of anxiety in my chest. It landed like in my upper chest area. And almost like in my throat felt, if I had to describe it to somebody, almost like somebody was not choking me, but definitely had a hold on me.

Teenagers and young people today I think have added anxiety. I. Didn’t really understand that until I watched my own kids. They’re in their twenties, as you know, and they deal with a lot of anxiety. My, my son deals with a lot of anxiety and my youngest deals with anxiety. They all do at different levels.

So I think it’s really important that we as parents, we as the humans that we are, we understand anxiety, we understand where it’s coming from, and that we are a role model of how we can work through it without having to do coping mechanisms that aren’t. So I’m so much better now as I have really good tools to process and work through the anxiety.

I know some of you more likely than not, might be really interested also in learning some tools, how you can deal with this better. So let’s talk about how to overcome anxiety. Or at least just keep it where it’s not interrupting you on a regular basis. But also I want you to know that it will help your anxiety, these coping mech mechanisms that I have, but it may never.

Go away altogether. Okay, that’s likely not gonna happen. It’s not like one day you work through these different tools and you wake up and you don’t have anxiety. Now it’s being able to control it, being able to understand it. So the first thing is that having anxiety is a normal part, in my opinion, of being alive.

You know, you evolved to where you are because you did things, you tried new things, you put yourself out there, you. Stay in the cave, and because of that you have anxiety. So really what is anxiety and the plain and simple of it is it’s a feeling. And for those of you that understand the model, Anxiety fits into the feeling line.

So my question for you is, what does anxiety feel like for you? Where do you feel it? How would you describe it for yourself? You know, the Googles describe anxiety as a feeling of worry, nervousness, or uneasy. Typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. Well, my friend , what’s more uncertain than going through divorce and getting to the other side and then starting the next chapter of your amazing life?

Right? It makes sense that going through. Would have anxiety and that it would show up probably more often than in other times of your life. So you see back in the cave person years, anxiety may have. Served us humans well because it was basically like an internal alert system. But as we evolved as humans, we, you know, we used to need anxiety to, to run away.

Something made us feel uneasy and our internal system told us, you need to feel anxious about this so that you can do something. This helped me to better understand the feeling of anxiety that back in the cave person years, it was necessary and, you know, going through until whenever it was necessary for survival.

To have that feeling. But nowadays, most of us are safe, most of us, even when we’re going through a horrible situation like a divorce. Or it could be the best thing that ever happened to you, I’m just gonna suggest that. Throw it out there, my friend. And, uh, for most it is, it does turn out being an amazing divorce.

Right? Worse. So, um, but the bottom line is that we don’t. Um, to protect ourselves physically like we used to. You know, a lot of times when you feel anxiety and think, oh my gosh, something is wrong with me. Maybe you’re thinking, I shouldn’t be feeling like this, but remember, it’s just part of the human, human experience.

It’s just part of who we are. And so if you place it into perspective that when you feel anxiety, they’re usually isn’t any threat to you physically. I can be, you know, safe and tucked and tucked nice and safe in my bed. Everything is fine, but I still feel anxiety. I mostly, like I said, feel it in the morning when I wake up and I think about my day, all the things I wanna do, all the things I should do, all the things I can do, all the balance that I’m trying to get into.

That’s where my most mind mostly comes in and I deal with it. I like to meditate. I’m a big meditator, and so I like to take at least no less than five to 10 minutes before I even get out of bed, just calming myself down. And I like to say that the feeling for me of anxiety is just a vibration in your body.

You know, it’s not gonna, it’s not gonna do anything to you. It just isn’t gonna feel real good, right? So some of you may have a hard time feeling the sens sensation of anxiety. And so I know, I think knowing what it feels, Bringing it, bringing it in tune with your body, understanding where your, I’m gonna use the word pain point is where the physical sensation of the feeling of anxiety lands for you is probably the first step.

I think it’s safe to say that anxiety, like I said, doesn’t feel good, but then again, it’s not intended. To feel good. When we think about the history of it, it’s one of those feelings that you have that kind of wakes you up physically. But what we can also know is that when we feel it, we don’t generally have to run or fight because most of the time, like I said, we’re not in danger.

It’s uncomfortable, but what we also can know, right, when we’re having that uncomfortable feeling is that. We can get past it, right? We can remember that now when we feel the anxiety, it does not mean anything’s wrong physically, danger wise. You know, H anxiety has typically meant many times throughout evol evolution that, like I said, you’re in danger and it’s normal.

It’s something that we have and we as a human race have adapted to. Evolving into another way of using anxiety that we don’t have to react. And to me that’s a huge difference. You know, we don’t have to do anything. We just couldn’t sit in it. Let me suggest that today some of the ways that anxiety can show up, it might be about what your future looks like.

During the divorce, you know, unsure is what support you’re gonna get or what the asset division’s gonna be, or how much time sharing there’s gonna be. That’s all a lot where you’re gonna live. Those are anxiety things. Thinking about your children, you know, are they gonna be okay through this? Thinking about yourself, uh, as well.

Interviewing for a new job, finding a new home. Even being involved with a new person. You know, these are the. The things that when we think about them, right, we can have a lot of anxiety, even little things that to some people are not little, and I’m not saying or, or belittling it, but look, let’s say you eat off protocol.

You gained a few pounds, or you over drank last night. You know, for a lot of people that causes anxiety as. In modern day anxiety, it doesn’t mean danger. There’s so few times when we are being literally attacked by someone that’s trying to hurt us, and most of us will go our whole lives and never have that kind of experience, knock on wood, right?

Yet, when we feel anxiety, we’re still having. Same kind of danger, physical reaction. We’re still tensing ourselves up. We’ll st We’re still getting ready to to fight. We’re getting ready to resist. We’re getting ready to go to battle. In truth, though, my friend, the exact opposite reaction is required Now, the exact.

So stay with me on this because we know that anxiety is just an uncomfortable emotion. So what do you do when you have an uncomfortable feeling? But maybe the better question is, what’s the best way to deal with feeling uncomfortable? And when I say the exact opposite, you know, before if you had that feeling, you would have that.

Or flight kind of mentality, you know, ready to go to battle, right? What I’m suggesting is that in today’s world, when you feel that you’re supposed to do the exact opposite, which is meditate, breathe, slow down, chill out, you know, that’s what we should be doing. We should be going to the others. Side of it.

But what many of us do is when we get that anxiety, we get more upset, more hurried, more tense, which leads to more anxiety, like putting fuel on the fire and making the fire bigger and bigger. Think about it, we’re adding worry to an already uncomfortable emotion, so best to go. Into the complete opposite direction, you know?

And so I hear what you’re saying to me, you’re okay. You’re like, okay, Doreen sounds great. It makes sense. I don’t wanna tense up and increase my anxiety. How do I do that? What are these tools that you’re talking about? So the first thing I’d like to do that works for me is to figure out where the anxiety is coming from.

What am I thinking that is causing the anxiety? You know, like this morning and last night, I felt it, but it took me a while to figure, actually, you know what? I’ve really, when I think about it, even thinking about it now, I really have been feeling anxiety the whole week. You know, I’m, uh, recording this on a Thursday.

But really since Monday I’ve been feeling this way and we’re leaving Friday. We’re leaving tomorrow. So I ha the first thing I like to do is figure out where is the anxiety coming from? Not physically for me that that shows in my upper chest area and my throat area. Like I said, it feels like heavy hand on me.

But what is causing me? What thoughts am I having that are causing me to feel this way? Remember, under the model that I teach, a circumstance happens. You have a thought about it, creates a feeling. In this case, anxiety. Then generally you have an action. And a result, right? So what are my thoughts? I’m thinking, what are my thoughts?

You hear that little ding. Sorry about that. Um, what are my thoughts that are causing it? And I finally figured it out, but it took me like really staying awake most of last night. It’s about being away for 10 days. It’s about my babies. Meaning my fur babies that are home, the office money clients, you know, all the things that go packing all up, getting my team together, having meetings, having systems in place so that everybody knows what to do so I can truly not be connected to the computer.

And I figured out that’s what it is. I just couldn’t put my finger on it. I just felt tense the entire week. If when you feel anxiety, you say, oh, I’m feeling, let’s say vaguely like vague. About my anxiety. I don’t know exactly where it’s coming from. I don’t know the thought that I’m having, especially if you’re in the divorce or just post-divorce, you know you’re recreating your life.

Where is it coming from? And really, this is again where I tell you, journaling is great, but sit down and think about it so that. That’s a first very important step because most people don’t take the time to figure out where their anxiety’s coming from. They just live in this anxiousness, not knowing why or where.

So knowledge, my friend, is key. The next step is really, really important. I call it choice time. Okay, choice time. And I suggest that there are four different choices when you feel anxious, when you have anxiety ready. First choice, and I think most go here or can relate, is that you fight against it, you resist it.

You’re like, I feel it. I don’t wanna feel this. I don’t know why I’m feeling. On like a cray cray person. You start, you know, doing all kinds of negative talk to yourself, but you push it down and maybe even, like I said, get mad and start judging yourself about it. And all that does is just think about it.

It adds fuel to the fire, it causes more anxiety. So imagine it like, Standing there mind, I want you to just imagine this. You’re standing there, you’re minding your own business, and along you’re just sitting there, right? I don’t know. Taking in, taking in the, uh, we live on the ocean, taking in the ocean.

You know, just looking at it, just having a great time. And imagine someone comes out of nowhere and they just start yelling at you. They just start cursing and getting in your face. Right now you are like, what is going on? Now? You, you can have a choice. You can start yelling back like, what, what? You know, what do you want?

Why are you yelling at me? Get outta my. In essence, you’ve just thrown fuel onto the fire and made the fire larger by feeding into it. Now you can turn one . That’s like turning one crazy person into two crazy people, right? But you have a choice. Person comes up to you mind name business. Starts yelling at you.

I don’t know, maybe you looked at them the wrong way or something, right? And you could yell back. That’s a choice. But what if you did nothing? When that crazy person starts yelling at you, in fact, you just sit there, put your hands to your heart center and smile at them. What does that look like? It likely didn’t.

Escalate, meaning there was no more fuel put on the fire, right? If you did that, it might be like, what’s going on? Now, I’m not suggesting, of course, that that’s how you handle people yelling at you, right? You don’t have to do that. All I’m saying is we have a choice. I’m just using it as an example of how you can either increase the tension in a situation and how you can deal with it, meaning your anxiety, right?

Increase the anxiety by feeding into it. And I’m Most anxiety happens for people not involving someone in their face. Right? I just brought that out as an example cuz it’s just a visual that I think you can see. So imagine yourself being the person that’s feeling. The anxiety and now you are bad talking yourself.

You’re having, you’re, that, that guy that just came over and like is yelling at you and you’re yelling back. So the first choice is not to react to it, right? Just to let it go. So let’s talk about the second choice you have is to react to it. The first one was to resist it. The second one is to react to it.

You certainly have that choice. Now, this is where I have to do a lot of my own work, and this is where I’ve had to do a lot of work for many, many years and it really took me becoming a life coach to understand these tools. But re reacting will show up like being short with people. Losing your temper with, with people around you, yelling at your kids, rushing around getting things done without purpose, like staying up late, you know, working, burning the midnight oil when you really should have slowed down and like probably got a better night’s sleep to help with your anxiety.

Might be that it shows up that you are a little more bossy, a little more short tempered. You know, it’s like you don’t have patience for anybody. That’s what I mean by fueling the anxiety, by reacting it to making and making the fire bigger. The third option is avoiding it. So remember we had. And react, and now we have, you can have a choice.

You can avoid it if the first one is resisting it. The second one is reacting to it and acting out. The third one is avoiding it. It almost, it’s almost like pretending it’s not there, let’s ignore it. Let’s pretend it’s not there. I’m not feeling anxious right now, and so you go and do something. I.

Buffering, we’ve talked about it and, and you can look it up in one of the other episodes, you do something pleasurable to immediately get that dopamine hit to avoid the anxiety. So it can be things like eating sweets or overeating or drinking alcohol or surfing the net or pornography. And there’s many things that gambling people do to avoid to get that dopamine hit, taking drugs.

Whatever, whatever it happens to be. So when you have your anxious feeling, you have a choice that you can resist it, you can react to it or you can avoid it. Now, avoiding it by using a false stimulant, like let’s just say alcohol or overeating, is never good because here’s what happens with that, eventually the drug of choice.

Goes away, right? The alcohol wears off the sh the cake no longer is there and you’re still left then with the anxiety that you didn’t figure out. Now you have the added anxiety of what you did, and usually you’re not proud of these things. Right? And the thing about. Avoiding with these false pleasures, right?

Is that it feels like it’s working in the moment. It really does. It feels like eating the cake is solving the anxiety for that moment because it’s a great distraction. It does take you into a whole different place for a moment, for a period of time, and soon as we stop actively avoiding it, like I said, it just comes back as I say, these options, you know?

Maybe you can see where you best would go. What is your choice? I want you to think about your anxiety last time. If you can recall that you felt anxiety, what was your choice? Where did you show up in these four choices? Right? So to recap, we have one first option is you can resist it. Just avoid it. The second, no, it’s there, but avoid.

Right. You’re not dumbing it. Um, you’re not doling it. Sorry. Dumbing it. . Okay. Well that could be a word too, right? You’re not doling it, you know it’s there, but you’re just letting it go. You’re resisting it. The section second option. Is we can react to it and act out on it, right? The third option is we can avoid it.

Then there’s another option, and this option I really, really, really, really want to encourage you to try the option is that you can actively accept it. Now, I use the word actively because it’s really, really important that you don’t see acceptance as giving. It’s not giving up again. When I am life coaching my divorce clients, I work with them on first accepting the divorce because you have to accept it first.

You don’t have to like it. You don’t have to agree with it, but you have to accept that it happened or it’s happening. But once you can accept it, then you can start to move on to change your life, to pick up the pieces. But acceptance is the key. And that’s true here too. When I say that to a client, sometimes they say to me, I don’t want to accept, I don’t wanna accept the divorce.

I don’t wanna accept what happened. You know, what he did, and all these things. I, I remind them, no, of course, the exact opposite is true when you accept something. Own something. That’s when you have all the power to change it. You can’t have the power to change it if you haven’t accepted it first. So by using the word actively accept.

It’s something that requires you to go to work. It requires that you are willing to quietly witness it, to observe it, to think about it. I’ve seen this over and over with my divorce clients who now do coaching with me. When they can go to that watcher place, when they can become the observer, when they can be in that observation place and watch themselves, the beauty starts to happen.

It starts to unfold. They start to put away the past and just start moving towards the FU future. And with that miraculously being, your anxiety starts to go down. Remember, they’re always gonna have it cuz we’re the humans. So other things are gonna happen in our life. Remember, it’s a 50 50 life, my friends.

It’s good and it’s bad. You have a good day and then you have not such a good day. Then you have a good year, maybe not such a good year. You get married, you get divorced, you have a baby. You know, unfortunately, people die. You know, it’s, it’s horrible, but it’s a 50 50 life because that’s, that’s the way that it works for us, right?

When you know that and you can accept that, and then you can start to move on, the anxiety will. To dissipate. You know, you start to learn that you can do hard things and when you know you can do hard things, you’re going to get stronger, my friend. You will. And soon as you allow your sense of control to come back, think about that.

When you feel anxious, can you allow it? Instead of resisting it? Instead of reacting to it? Instead of avoiding it, can you allow it to just be there and take control of it? It’s a very. intellectual way of thinking about it. But I promise you, especially those first, that suffer like with anxiety almost on a daily basis like I did, especially when I was practicing law at a very high level.

You know, I was in the courtroom all the time. I’m telling you, I mean, the anxiety, you felt like it definitely was gonna jump outta your body or just burst you into like, So I’m, I’m sure some of you totally know what I’m talking about here. The word that I’d like to use with my client is, is stay and let it be.

Stay and let it be. Meaning stay with the anxiety. Let it be when you allow anxiety. You said that. As I said before, it’s quite harmless. It, it, it just buzzes around. It’s one of those vibrations that is in your mind based on a thought, and it’ll eventually run through your body. I also want to just remind us.

That there seems to be this idea that, and I just spoke about this, that we should be comfortable all the time. I don’t think that’s true. I think that probably half of our life, you know, the 50 50 is going to be a disaster. It’s just not gonna be good. And I hope you don’t think I’m a pessimist, but things happen, bad things unfortunately happen.

You know, we just. School shootings, horrific things happen and it’s, it’s the way it is. I think that probably half of our life is going to be not so great, but the other half is going to be and can be amazing. Now you can work towards amazing. You can do things in your life, so you have much more amazing.

And that’s what I do in my life coaching. I bring you faster from being in that dark place after divorce to getting over it, moving on, and using all that energy. Right. Last episode was about anger and divorce. Using all that energy to fuel you. Okay. You know, when I think about it and I think about the things that I’ve done in my life, of course I.

Mistakes of stor. Of course I made bad choices, right? I wish I could go back and change things, but I’m a human just like the rest of us, and we are gonna all, you know, make bad choices from time to time and do some silly things. So I’m really, you know, I’ve really been telling myself this a lot lately and I can’t even tell you how.

Much peace. It gives me knowing that I’m uncomfortable with anxiety, knowing that it’s just part of the human experience and it’s actually been one of those emotions that has got me and, and if I want to think about it, my ancestors to stay alive this long. Right. It’s kind of a cool thing. You can start changing your relationship with anxiety and I can see that, yes, it’s no longer as useful as.

To be, but it’s still here and it’s still part of us. And if you know it and understand it, it doesn’t have to overtake your life and you don’t have to react to it, resist it, or avoid it. First and foremost, actively accepting it and reminding yourself nothing has gone wrong. It’s just anxiety is a first step.

Remember, you’re not allowed to beat yourself up. If you feel like beating yourself up, you better send me an. Okay. It’s d yaha life balance lawyer.com. You can also go to my, uh, your Amazing Divorce podcast online, but I’m not sure that my email’s up there, but you can always reach me. Okay? You have to go back and look at the power of your thoughts.

That’s the next thing. Remember, the feeling is coming from our thoughts, and I, you know, I do a lot of talking in my episodes and there’s, uh, one of the episodes is on the model. M O D E L. I want you to understand that, especially my new listeners, cuz when I do my coaching with my divorce women, okay? When I do my coaching with them, we work through the model.

It’s like the basis of the foundation. We move around it, we understand why do we choose to make cer have certain thoughts? Why are we not choosing to think something different? I mean, really, really amazing, powerful stuff. And I know it works cuz I’ve done it on myself. Okay? And I’ve been coached and I still get coached, right?

Remember the example of if you’re sitting minding your own business and someone comes over and yells is not the words they say, it’s your thought about the words that create the feeling. Remember that because two people could hear, hear the same exact words and have a completely different thought. We see it all the time on the news, right?

So the thought stay with me is not reality. These thoughts are not facts. They’re thoughts that are choices. That we are choosing. You know, I don’t, myself, I don’t immediate necessarily try to immediately change my thoughts and go from happy land, you know, to sad land or from sad land to happy land when I’m dealing with anxiety, right?

I try to just understand where it’s coming from. When you understand the cause of. When you understand where it’s stemming from, that’s when you can start to get your power back over it. You know? So don’t try and change it. Don’t get mad at yourself for your thoughts. It’s not useful. Just look at them and be like, Hmm, that’s interesting.

Why am I thinking that? Like for me, why am I thinking that going away with my husband for a 10 day vacation is a big dealio? Like, I have an amazing team. I have systems in place. Why are you doing this right? It’s not rational. It’s false evidence appearing real. Something hasn’t even happened and I’m already anxious about it.

I know that. You know, things are scary, especially after divorce, and especially when you don’t have a lot of control over certain circumstances. Right. But you do have control over your thoughts. So one of the things that I like to do with my clients before they get into that full place of anxiety, anxiety, I like to have them.

Sit with it for like 10 minutes. You know, like, can, can we sit with this? Can we understand where it’s coming from? Can we understand the thoughts? Be like, I’ll say to them, what do you wanna coach on today? How are you feeling? Or, I’m feeling a lot of anxiety. I’m like, really? So where are you feeling that anxiety?

You know, where is it showing up for you? When I get anxious, I feel it in my chest. Where are you feeling it? Oh, I’m feeling it in my throat. Okay. And how long have you been feeling? Well, it’s been for a few days now. Well, what’s going on in your life? What’s happening in your life that’s causing you the anxiety?

What is the thought around it? Have you given that any consideration? Right, and can we just sit here and talk about that? Can we work through that? You know? And when you purposely sit down and you do that and you’re, you let yourself really live in it and just understand it, it’s so empowering. It’s so empowering.

It’s just, Miraculously, you know, uh, the power that can come over you when you start to really get it, it’s uncomfortable when you’re going through it, for sure, even when you’re talking with a coach about it or if you’re doing your own self coaching, right? So anyhow, so now I wanna talk about. Ha. You know, people that get to a place where they really get past that point of anxiety to more like panic attacks, you know, to really feeling like they can’t even breathe.

And I’ve had a few panic attacks in my life. Not fun. Feels like a heart attack. Feels like, you know, somebody’s got their, yeah, you can’t breathe. Their wind pipe is closed. So you know when you’re dealing with those types of anxiety situations, but I really think any, but especially those where they’re at that high, higher level.

I had one friend growing up, her name’s Danielle, for the life of me. I cannot find her anyhow, but she used to get major panic attacks. We’d go out. In our twenties, go to the club, go to the places people go, or went back then. Right. And, uh, she would have panic attacks half of the time that we went out. She literally, cuz it was crowded and she, she just literally would like f like fall to the ground right in the middle of the place.

Um, What I, what I like to do, if people deal with severe panic attacks is number one, obviously you wanna go talk to a, a licensed therapist, maybe even a doctor, but breathe please. If you slow your body down, if you do the meditation, the breathing, the relaxation, the, the slow walking, the taking in, the beautiful.

It is amazing how you can physically go out for a five minute walk and it will just suppress all that physical anxiety. So that’s something to consider as well. You know, taking those, taking those, um, exercise. To a different level, you know, going online, you know, if you’d like to Google people or go onto YouTube, there’s such great resources out there.

Um, the other night I couldn’t sleep and I’m sure you all, or most of you ever heard, Of the app com. So I just put the music on, you know, and didn’t work perfectly. I’m gonna be completely honest, my mind was still going a million miles, but it did help, you know, it definitely helped. I also like to inhale and like feel the, the air going in and out of my diaphragm, in and out of my body.

It almost sometimes feels like, um, high, like you’re high. So I would tell you that because. You’re, when you’re in a space of connecting yourself with your consciousness, when you’re in that like meditative state, you know, you get to a different level where you don’t wanna do things that hurt you, like overdrinking and overeating and over worrying.

You, you, it really can be very empowering. It doesn’t work for everybody. But if. Give it a try and it’s your thing, or maybe it’s yoga or maybe it’s going for a run. You know, whatever is good for you. So again, my friends, anxiety does not mean something has gone terribly wrong. Anxiety means that you are a human being, that you are alive, that you have a beating heart, and you are breathing, that you are getting past this.

And you will be okay. It is not a problem until we make it a problem by resisting it, by reacting to it, or avoiding it. And I really, really wanna encourage you to accept actively, to actively accept it. Write down your thoughts, use your breathing okay, and we’re all gonna be okay. I promise. So listen, go do your breathing.

Go do your exercise. Know where your anxiety’s coming from today. You’ve been through a lot. Divorce is not easy, but you, my friend, can have an amazing life after divorce, and I know it because I’ve done it and I’ve seen it. Many, many times. All right, listen, love yourself. Be kind to people and have a super amazing week.

All right, my friends. See you next week. Bye.

You have the vision of what you want your life to look like after divorce, but maybe you just don’t know how to get there. So, Ready to take control of your life and want to find out more about our coaching? Visit [email protected]. That’s l a d as in life after divorce-coaching.com. Until next. Time, have an amazing rest of your day.

And remember, yes, you can have an amazing life after, after divorce.