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Ep. 76 – Candice Toone

Candice Toone is a former Marriage and Family Therapist turned Master Certified Life Coach and the founder of the Defying Gravity Revolution. Her mission is to help women stop wondering if they married the wrong guy and start enoying the marriage they imagined when they said “I do”. She’s a podcaster, author, connoisseur of grapefruit juice and a Jazzercise enthusiast. She lives in Utah with her husband, 3 children and their dog.

Transcript

Doreen: Hey everybody, it’s Doreen again. We’re here for episode number 76 and we have a treat for you today. We have Candice Toone. Candice is a former marriage and family therapist turned master, certified life coach, and the founder of Defying Gravity Revolution. Her mission is to help women stop wondering if they married the wrong guy and start enjoying the marriage they imagine when they said, I do. So, today we’re gonna talk about going from single life after divorce to a new relationship. So if you are ready, let’s get started.

Are you ready to create a life that’s better than ever before? We are Doreen Yaffa and Jeff Wilson, and we are here to give you the strategies you need to create the life after divorce that you deserve and desire. As partners both in marriage and coaching, we use our expertise as well as our own personal experiences to help you make the next chapter of your life the best chapter.

Hey, Candace!.

Candice: How are you?

Jeff: Good to see you again? Hello Candice!

Candice: Nice to see you both.

Doreen: Well first of all, thank you so much. We had some Zoom issues but you came to the rescue, so thank you so much. We get back cuz we’re recording on Zoom and we’re here in sunny south Florida. It’s about 82 degrees. Doing well. I know you’re in Utah and  beautiful snow.

Candice: Much less than that about in the forties.

Doreen: So now we wanted to have you on today, you know, dealing with, people after divorce mostly is what life after divorce coaching, as you know. And I know that you are a therapist by trade, by education, and now a certified life coach.

Candice: That’s right.

Jeff: Master Certified

Doreen: Master Certified.

Candice: Oh yes. Make sure I can get that in there.

Doreen: So tell us, how long have you been life coaching and why did you decide to go into that field specifically?

Candice: Yeah, so I’ve been a coach for a little under four years, I think. And the reason that I switched from therapy to coaching is that there’s a lot more flexibility for both the client and the clinician in the coaching realm.

Also, therapy tends to be a disease model, so it looks at clients as though there’s something to heal and fix, whereas coaching assumes there’s, you’re already working great just as you are. We just can make it even better than it is currently, and I like that vibe more.

Doreen: Yeah, we spoke in one of our episodes, didn’t we, Jeff, about coaching versus coaching versus therapy.

Jeff: Correct.

Doreen: And how sometimes you even can use them, especially after divorce or when you’re dealing with divorce in, you know, together.

Candice: Totally, yes. 100%. Yep. Therapy will typically look at like the backwards way. They’ll like go into your past and what stories you had, and the coaching usually looks into the future, so it’s nice to have them together as a compliment.

Doreen: Yeah. Sometimes when we find our clients, you know, when we do our initial consult with them, we recognize or suggest to them that maybe there’s some past issues that they need to resolve and kind of work on, like why they keep choosing the same kind of person over and over again.

Candice: Yep.

Doreen: And how the coaching is really looking more forward. And creating this new amazing life. So what do you love most about coaching?

Candice: I love helping people see that there’s nothing wrong with them, because I think once we really internalize it, actually there’s nothing wrong with me. I’m not broken. There’s no like major challenge that can never be overcome.

Then when we really internalize that belief about ourselves, the possibilities just explode, and I love when that shit happens.

Doreen: Yeah, it’s really amazing to see our clients going from the place where we find them, especially after divorce, to where they can be. And you know, we’re, we’re all dealing with our issues, right? We all have stuff going on in our life. That 50 50. Sometimes is good. Sometimes it’s not good. So specifically you’re dealing with what niche? I talked a little bit in the intro about it, but I’d love to know more about your niche.

Candice: Yeah, so like you said, I help women stop wondering if they married the wrong guy.

Usually the women I work with are afraid of their husbands for some reason. Either they think he’s like withholding resources or something like that, or maybe he’s violent something. There’s some big challenge that they feel powerless against, and that’s who I tend to focus on because I know that even if those things are going on in a marriage, the both spouses still have power and sometimes she forgets that she has them. And I like to help her reclaim it so that she can make a decision to stay or go.

Doreen: And you focus only on women, right?

Candice: Only women.

Doreen: Only women. But the conversation that we’re gonna have today, I’m sure it would apply to both male and female.

Candice: Yeah. Just like switch the pronouns.

Doreen: So, you know, when we are dealing with our clients, we try to focus on really coaching them after the divorce process because being a family lawyer for over 25 years, you know, the one thing that I’ve learned is there’s a lot going on in that litigation process and that trying to divorce and while a lot of our clients maybe want to start coaching, During the divorce, I really, I like  to kind of find out like where are they mentally? Are they able to get into that? Is that the good time? So that’s why we generally focus after divorce when the final judgment is signed and they’re on with their new life.

So one of the things that always comes up is I’ll never find somebody new. I’m just gonna fall into the same pattern again of, you know, all the issues that I dealt with in my previous marriage, you know, all those types of things. So, looking at that, I mean, do you have any advice for when it might be best to start coaching after divorce or during divorce, or when are you ready? Like when do you know you’re ready?

Candice: Yeah, of course it’s gonna vary person to person, but I think a pretty like reliable indicator is like the level of emotional activation, which means like how able are you to look objectively at all the things that have happened during the litigation? Are we still in the place where there’s a lot of grief and loss going on?

If that’s the case, then it might be useful to find either like a somatic kind of coach that like deals with processing and release of trauma or a therapist. But if you’re like, yeah, okay, I’m still kind of sad, I’m still kinda like have some fears about the future, but I’m like willing to take a step back or able to take a step back and just look objectively, then that’s when coaching I think is a really good option.

Jeff: Are there any general obstacles that you feel people confront during a divorce?

Candice: Well, I mean, there’s all kinds of like, why wasn’t I worth him making a change or her making a change? Or why did they behave this way to me? What does that mean about me? What does that mean about my future? What’s gonna happen for my kids?

So like, basically there’s a lot of relational, I would almost say trauma that goes through the divorce process because it’s an actual splitting up of the way that you thought your family was gonna look. And there’s a lot of trauma that can go along with that. So typically it’s mostly like, am I gonna be okay?

Am my kids gonna be okay? Are our finances gonna be okay? I know you know all of that already, but mostly just the fear of uncertainty. The fear and uncertainty I would say are the biggest obstacles.

Doreen: I think so too. I mean, I noticed that a lot of people, you know, that that would probably resonate with a lot of our listeners today.

You know, that fear. And they are, you know, many of them come to us and they are dealing with the trauma. It’s, what do they say that divorce is next to a death? It’s one of the most traumatic experiences.

Candice: A hundred percent.

Doreen: So, you know, sometimes just recognizing that, just appreciate. And I like to also let them know that there can be a grieving process and you don’t have to jump from, I’m sad and angry to like, I’m amazing and happy.

Candice: And you probably won’t and you’ll probably go back and forth.

Doreen: Right. And so, you know, that grieving process and dealing with that I think is like a fundamental, like healthy place to start. What are your thoughts?

Candice: Yeah, I think without doing that grieving process, then everything else is going to be more challenging. And like you said, you’re gonna continue to perpetuate the same decisions that maybe got you into the relationship setup that you were in the first place. And so you want to do that grief so that you have the space to maybe we say in coaching land, clean up your thinking. Meaning like, let’s just tell the truth about everything. Let’s tell the truth about ourselves. Let’s tell the, tell the truth about the choices we’re making. And without that grief process of the kind of relieving that tension and that energy, it’s harder to clean up your thinking without doing that first.

Doreen: It is,  and I always encourage ’em not to beat themselves up so much.

Candice: A hundred percent. There’s no upside to doing that at all. And even in like what is typically called an amicable divorce, like we’re both want this, like there’s still probably some degree of grief and uncertainty and fear that goes along with those.

Jeff: How do you help them when they didn’t want the divorce? Divorce wasn’t their right. You’re grieving over that.

Candice: Yeah, so what I would do is I would ask each individual person, okay, so you didn’t want that. What are you making it mean? And they’re usually gonna make it mean something like, I wasn’t worth it, or I did something wrong, or some version of that.

So we would wanna find out the specific version that they’re telling and then just poke holes in that story. Give it back to the spouse. They made their decision for reasons that were related to them, and it doesn’t necessarily mean anything about you or your future potential to be happy in a relationship.

Doreen: Yeah. Such good stuff. So there comes a point in time where I find that, I mean, we find they’re ready to start getting out there again. Right. And it’s so interesting how some people are really, they, they believe they’re ready right away. Others, it takes years for them to get to that place where they think their thoughts are okay, I’m at a place now where I can get out and meet somebody.

So, that’s always a big, you know, consideration is, okay, I’m never gonna find somebody, or when am I ready to find somebody or am I gonna make the same mistakes over? And that’s where you come in, right? Is really about that new relationship. Right? Tell us what you, like some advice you might give to our listeners.

Candice: I think what the biggest favor they could do for themselves is tell themselves the truth about why the initial marriage went the way that it did or, and what that means is like, why did you make the choices that you made? Like let’s just assume you had a good reason back then. Probably your good reason was you wanted to find security.

You wanted to be, have stability. You wanted to feel love. Of course you do. And so in order to do that, in your last marriage, you made compromises or you made concessions that maybe you don’t want to make again. So let’s just notice what those were so that we can watch for them in the future, and then establish your belief that you can still get that security, that connection, that love, without making those concessions, even if it feels a little scary and you’re not sure you can.

Doreen: And I think the knowing what those concessions are is really so important. So many times I hear that people get back into a relationship, you know, we call it a rebound or something like this, and they haven’t thought about what they really want. What are their, like this I must have and why you want that, you know, to know that, you know what that might be.

You know, maybe it’s someone who’s financially stable or maybe it’s someone like a no, no go is gonna be, they have kids and you don’t, and so you don’t want someone in a relationship that you have stepchildren kind of situation.  So knowing what you want and those concessions is probably a great starting place.

Candice: Yeah. Knowing what you want and what you don’t want. Like you said, if you don’t want kids and they have them, then you get to work on the belief that I can find someone who doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want kids, and I can make the life that I want.

Doreen: Absolutely.

Jeff: How do you not sabotage a new relationship by bringing in old baggage, so to speak?

Candice: Yeah. So you want to just be, again, really honest with yourself about what the old baggage was. Oh, I tend to do this or that or the other, or, I tend to make it mean this or that. When my partner does X, Y, or Z. That is something that I’ve created within my head, which is fine. Everybody creates things in their own head.

We just wanna know what we tend to do, and then actively watch for, oh, I’m bringing that here. It’s okay that I’m bringing that here. The brain likes to be efficient. The brain likes to do the same thing over and over, and I don’t want that outcome, so I’m gonna consciously not bring my baggie in because I’m so aware of what it was.

Doreen: Absolutely. What about, what should one see or count as like a big red flag when getting to know new people romantically in general?

Candice: Yeah. I mean, generally speaking, of course everybody has their own different red flags based on their preferences. But generally speaking, if someone is unable to like have some empathy towards your side, even if they don’t agree with you or they don’t share your same values and wants, they need to at least have demonstrate some ability to understand what your wants are and why you would want them, even if they don’t agree.

And I’m talking big wants, little wants. I want to eat Mexican for dinner. I want to, you know, retire in Miami, whatever. Any sort of wants, like there needs to be a back and forth discussion where both sides are respected, and if a partner is incapable of that, I would be really cautious of that.

Doreen: That would be a huge red flag, right? Let’s say, we have a listener out there that is ready to get started on finding, you know, maybe being open to the idea of being in a new relationship and they don’t have children, but they really want children. You know, that’s that. And then, they’re dating people who already have children or maybe people who are, don’t want children.

I mean, how does one go about like having those conversations with someone new? Like is there a timeframe? Like how many dates do you go on before you take out that checklist and you’re like, wait a second, these are my right.

Candice: Yeah, so the best advice I can offer there is there’s no hard and fast rule of how many dates you, it just depends on like how much time you’re willing to spend.

Like some people do ask that sort of thing on the first date just because they wanna save time and effort. Other people wanna get to know the person a little bit more. But I, on big conversations like that, do I want kids? Do I not want kids? I probably wouldn’t wait that long.

Doreen: I agree with you because unless, would you agree with me? Unless you’re dating just for the fun of it.

Candice: Oh, sure. If you’re not trying to get into a new serious relationship, then it doesn’t really matter. But if your goal is to establish a family, then you probably don’t wanna spend a lot of time dating someone who really, really doesn’t want that.

Doreen: Absolutely.

Jeff: How does one make themselves let’s say ready to date or more attractive for the dating world?

Candice: Yeah, so attractive is definitely in the eye of the beholder. So you get to decide to yourself, what would I be attracted to? And then make yourself that. Like maybe I’m really put together, maybe I’m not, I don’t know. You get to decide like, what would I be attracted to in the world? And then try to do that, and then you’ll attract somebody who has similar values to you, most likely, and you want to say, okay, I don’t wanna make my new dating relationship also my therapist.

Right. So I want to have that established somewhere else. I either want to have an actual therapist or I wanna have a sister or a friend or someone who I talk to about all my relationship baggage so that when I’m with this new person, it’s all about just this new relationship and what we have moving forward.

Cuz most of the time, I would guess people don’t really wanna hear a ton about some person that’s no longer part of your life.

Doreen: Yeah, I’ve seen that, you know, you see that in movies and different things, you know? Those start talking about their old relationship and the other person’s like, oh my gosh.

You can just see their whole demeanor changing. Right?

Candice: Right. And they can also, in their head, it’s like, oh, this is who I’m gonna be compared to. This is the standard that’s been established, and nobody likes to have that in a new relationship. They just wanna be known for who they are and what’s going on between the two people in the room. Not anybody who’s come before.

Doreen: What else?

Jeff: Well, what about trust? How does somebody establish trust with a new partner?

Doreen: Yeah, that’s a good one.

Candice: Yeah. So you have to have trust in yourself first. That’s the part that we sometimes skip is we think I’m gonna hand all of this to you and I’m gonna trust you to take care of it because I don’t wanna manage my own emotional life myself.

And that is If you’re not willing to manage your own emotional life by yourself, it may not be the time for you to start trying to get into a new serious relationship. So what you wanna say is like, okay, I’m gonna trust that this person, I’m just benefit of the doubt. Just like we trust people to not run into us with their car.

I’m just gonna trust people in the world to generally be nice and until I have reason to believe this person in front of me isn’t gonna be that way. I’m just gonna give them the benefit of the doubt because as soon as I discover that they aren’t, I trust myself enough to remove myself from that situation or to hold my boundary or something like that.

And that really comes from a solid place of knowing this is what I will and won’t accept, and this is what I’m gonna do if something I won’t accept shows up here.

Doreen: So you wanna go? So let me understand. So you wanna go into that new potential relationship? Open mind, not judgment as to trust or no trust.

Just keep it open and have those wants, those checklists of what’s important. But but be aware, right?

Candice: Yeah, a hundred percent. Especially because in the beginning of the relationship, you’re probably gonna start out with something sort of smaller. I’m gonna meet you for coffee, I’m gonna go out to dinner with you.

I’m not gonna move into your house probably on the first date because that probably leaves you open to more vulnerability than you maybe want and because you trust yourself. You decide what level of vulnerability you’re willing to hold yourself in.

Doreen: Yeah. I’ll tell you a little secret about Jeff and I. We got married in five months.

Candice: That’s awesome. You both decided that you were willing to be that vulnerable and take care of yourselves in that relationship. It seems like it’s worked out for you.

Doreen: I look, well, it’s 14 years, right? Right. Is it?

Jeff: It’s, it’ll be 14.

Doreen: It’ll be 14. We thought it was 14, but it really is 13.

Jeff: We’re just, we’re not counting anymore.

Doreen: We’re not counting, but it, you know.

Candice: And you two might be an example of like two people that were already really like centered and ready to take care of themselves, and then just combined, which it can work out quickly. Not saying that there’s any sort of timeframe that you have to follow.

The measurement is how willing am I to protect and hold onto myself? First with my own trust for myself and then I can trust someone else cuz I’m already so solid with me.

Jeff: Candice, do you have any tips that that would give you the no notion that you are ready to get out there socially and romantically?

Candice: Yeah, I think if you can tell an honest story to yourself about your past marriage, even if it like has some unflattering parts for yourself. If you can tell all of that without being emotionally activated and you can just hold all your own stuff, I think go for it.

Doreen: How do you get there? Like how do you get to that point though? You know?

Candice: Yeah. It all comes from like, listen, I am a human, so yes, I wouldn’t do that again. I understand why I did that in the first round. I have some awareness and compassion around my own story, and a coach can help you discover where that comes from. And then I also have some awareness and compassion for what my partner did in the last marriage, so I know why all of that happened.

I can see all of it. And you just practice telling that story without, like you said before, beating yourself up for it or feeling guilty for it. You’re just like, yep, I was a human. That was the best that I could do back then, and now I know some more things and so I’m gonna do a different kind of best moving forward.

Doreen: And I think it can be so exciting to think about that new possibilities. Right?

Candice: Yeah, totally.

Doreen: What a new relationship might look like, you know, without putting so much pressure on yourself and expectations, right?

Candice: Yes. Or the on them. Not on yourself. Not on them. We’re just gonna see how this goes.

Here’s what I know. I’ll accept. Here’s what I know. I’m, it’s an absolute no for me. And as long as I trust myself to honor my absolute, I’m gonna be just fine.

Doreen: We kind of touched on it a little bit, you know, Jeff and I getting married in five months. And you know, I guess every individual is different as to when you feel like that they’re ready. And I don’t know that you ever get to that point where you’ve, you know, is that procrastination If you’re thinking like, I’m not ready yet. We have some clients that have been divorced for years and seem to have some very justified excuses, thoughts about, maybe, excuses isn’t the right word, but thoughts as to get back out there.

So, knowing you’re ready. I think it’s, you know it, how do you know? You just, you know.

Candice: All depends on like how you’re feeling. Go ahead, Jeff.

Jeff: How do they work through if they don’t feel they’re worthy?

Candice: Yeah, that’s, so again, we would be like, what does, how do we would ask them like, what does that even mean?

How, what’s the measuring stick you’re using? Is that a measuring stick you like? Is that a measuring stick you’d apply to your sister or your daughter or your best friend, somebody that you really care about? Would you use that same measuring stick on that person and just kind of really make sure that they like them, the measuring that they’re using. Maybe they do, and some people it is wise to take a little bit longer time because they’ve had so much hurt in the marriage, or they have so little trust with themselves that maybe it would be better to spend some time releasing that hurt and creating a relationship with themselves before they can effectively relate to someone else.

Doreen: Yeah, I see that a lot. I see. You know, they’ve been a mom and a wife and working and really focused on so many external things that this new time after divorce that they are really reorganizing their life as individual, you know, and a lot of people come to us and they feel that the focus needs to be on their children and which is amazing.

A beautiful thing. Right? Or getting their financials in place, or moving into a new home and they’re forgetting about taking care of themselves.

Candice: Yes.

Doreen: Putting that oxygen mask on first. And that’s okay. And they have a lot of guilt with that. They, you know, I have a lot of guilt with, well, why would I take care of myself?

My kids went through the divorce as well, and you know, so I really should give a hundred percent of my time focused on them and their wellbeing, and it’s a beautiful thought, right?

Candice: That causes a lot of pain.

Doreen: Causes a lot of pain. And how can you be in a place, you know, the question is, how can you be in a place to really be your best for someone else when you haven’t taken care of yourself first?

Candice: Yeah. And you wanna question the idea that I can take care of my kids or myself. What if you could figure out a way to do both things?

Doreen: Absolutely. Right.

Jeff: What if the family or the children disapprove of you dating again?

Candice: Yeah. I mean, that’s pretty likely. So you might just expect that that’s gonna be the case, and then you give them room for it.

Of course, they wish that you stayed together with their other parent probably like of course a kid would want that. A kid is also young and does like inexperienced in life and doesn’t understand all the nuances. So we can let them be disapproving without changing our behavior. If we feel really centered about it, you can hold space for both.

I get that you don’t want me to do this kid. I totally understand. It’s hard for you. I’m happy to listen to you about it all the time. It’s not gonna change my behavior, but I wanna listen to what you have to say, right? Usually the kid will come around.

Doreen: What I recommend in those circumstances as well is depending on the age of the child, you speak to them differently.

Candice: A hundred percent.

Doreen: To speak with a therapist sometimes as to how that might be, what that looks like.

Candice: Yes, yes, yes.

Doreen: There’s nothing wrong with using available resources that you have to help you to figure out how to best navigate. You know, when family members, children are not approving, we were. I don’t, I, I don’t know if our kids approved or not.

Jeff: They were, I think they told us years later.

Doreen: Yeah, late years later. Cuz they were young. I mean, they were anywhere from I think 10 down. Right?

Jeff: Of course there were, you know, friends and associates in the day and the lawyer business that were like, what do you paid? Are you crazy?

Doreen: I mean, I had a lot of people in my life that disapproved of my getting married to Jeff.

It miraculously though both of our mothers, were met us together, obviously, like met for dinner at, I think it was at my house, and they were like on board. Wasn’t that weird? I was expecting them to be, what are you doing? What are you guys doing? And they, I don’t know if it, for whatever reason, they were just totally on board, which made it a lot easier, you know?

Candice: Yeah. It is, of course, easier if people agree with you. Always human beings like that. And it’s likely that they might not. And so if you go into it expecting that, then you’re not gonna be as jarred by it. My mentor and Jeff’s mentor, Brooke Castillo, she says, if somebody’s gonna be unhappy with my life, I don’t want it to be me.

Doreen: Yes. Isn’t that so you’re like.

Candice: It’s fine. I get that you would want me to make a different choice and I still feel good about the choice I’m making is a really solid place to be. And also a nice model for your kids.

Doreen: It’s a great model for children. Right. I think we should do more of teaching them about that.

Just had a small conversation with one of my, our middle daughter Megan. We unfortunately lost one of our dogs recently. It was, it was, She was five. She was my baby. And so I was mentioning to Megan this morning that we have a puppy that somebody has told us about and you know, he’s gonna come for a visit, and she’s like, well, what kind of puppy is it?

I’m like, well, it’s the same type as our last puppy, you know, our last dog. She goes, mom, you shouldn’t get a dog like that again. You know, blah, blah, blah. All these reasons, you know, like, and I thought, no, I have to do what makes me happy. You know? What I want as far, but it’s a small example, but just,

Candice: I mean, the principal’s the same.

Doreen: The principal’s the same. And then for a moment, my mind, my thought went to, oh yes, I should definitely not look at the same breed because my daughter has told me that’s not good, but we want to, right? Yeah. We love the same breed. So I was like, oh, well I gotta make us happy. We’re the one that’s dealing with the dog.

You know, we’re the one that’s if we’re gonna, you know, that’s offer. Yes. Yeah.

Jeff: So, what type of coaching do you offer groups individual?

Candice: I have a program, which means that like you can join and then you’re in forever. Because I coach people who are married or in relationships and usually we want our relationships to last for a long time.

So the coaching program lasts for lifetime as well, and we do group coaching in that in my program and then also I have body-based healers come in. So like tapping specialists breath work, those sort of things that connect our bodies and our brains because like we were saying before, if you haven’t processed through your trauma or your grief or whatever, the thought work piece is a little harder. So I have a leg up in my program for that.

Doreen: Oh, that’s beautiful. I love that. I would love to learn more about that. I had a question that, do most of your clients, do their spouse know that they’re coaching with you? Or is it, is it like.

Candice: Yeah, I get letters from husbands. Sometimes it’s kind of fun. They’re like, I don’t know what you’re doing over there, but I’m happy to have paid for it.

Doreen: Oh, that’s so interesting. Do you ever.

Candice: Yeah. Cause No, go ahead.

Doreen: Do you ever bring the spouse the other side in?

Candice: I haven’t yet, but I’m thinking that I might do a retreat where they both come.

Doreen: Ah, but you were gonna say something.

Candice: But I also think that like, you don’t have to have your husband on board. I tell my clients all the time, I’m like, listen, he doesn’t have to know anything that we’re doing because all that we’re doing is looking at your self-concept in the relationship. And when you think that I’m loved, I’m powerful, I have some respect and responsibility here, the whole marriage will shift.

Cuz usually what I find is the partner already thinks that about her. And she’s just having a hard time seeing it. And so when she sees it too, he’s like, yeah, I already knew that you were awesome. Oh, most of, most of the time. And so it’s kind of fun.

Doreen: If we have clients that are thinking about relationships, that’s not where you would coach them or would you coach them?

Candice: I can still coach them. I have people that aren’t married. I will just say most of the people in my program are married or they’re looking at a relationship. But you can come in at any point because I think this, we also coach on relationships with our kids or with our bosses or whatever. So any type of relationship that you’re interested in improving this the program I have would work.

Doreen: What a great program and coaching to be able to, you know, really dive into that so that you’re gonna give your best shot to your new relationship. Yes. Or whatever relationship it’s Right.

Candice: Yes. A hundred percent Your new relationship or your relationship. That’s kind of been stagnant.

A lot of people come, they’re like, I’ve been married for 15 years and ugh. And then I kinda like revive that a little bit, which is nice.

Doreen: Or 14 or 13, whatever, 14 books. All right. I’ll be calling you later.

Jeff: How does somebody get in touch with you? Yeah, so my website is just candicetoone.com.

Candice with an I tune with an E and there’s a message me button on there. You can also email me directly at [email protected].

Doreen: Great. Great. Any last words or thoughts or, it’s been such a pleasure.

Candice: Yeah, it’s been really fun to chat with you. I just, I would love to know, I’ll look you up, but I’d love to know more about what you’re doing cuz I think we’re kind of like on the trajectory together, right?

Like you have them after they get divorced and then once they have a new relationship, I think it’s so beautiful to collaborate with coaches that do different things. So thank you for bringing me on.

Doreen: Absolutely. Absolutely. Well listen, thank you so much. I’m sorry about the technical difficulty.

Candice: It’s no big deal at all. Don’t even worry about it.

Doreen: Thank you so much and yeah, we’ll definitely collaborate again and love to have and talk about other subjects.

Candice: It’s great to see you again too. You guys have the rest of a great day.

Doreen: You too. Amazing weekend. All right, thanks.

Jeff: Thank you.

Jeff: You have the vision of what you want your life to look like after divorce, but maybe you just don’t know how to get there. So if you’re ready to take control of your life and want to find out more about our coaching, visit us at lad-coaching.com. That’s L A D as in life after divorce dash coaching.com.

Doreen: Until next time, have an amazing rest of your day. And remember, yes, you can have an amazing life after divorce.

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