Ep. 173 – Navigating the Holidays

00:00:00:00 – 00:00:16:02
Jeff
The holidays are upon us once again. And if you’re not feeling the warm and fuzzies, we definitely understand the holidays can bring up memories. Whether they’re good or they’re bad. So today on episode 163, we’re going to be discussing the holidays.

00:00:16:03 – 00:00:42:20
Jeff
So if you’re ready, let’s get started. Hello there Doreen, how are you? Well, I am laughing because we are in our silly, Christmas sweaters. I think they’re silly. Well, we didn’t plan it this way. We had a holiday party this past Saturday, right? For, the office. It was really nice. And we had an ugly and ugly sweater contest, which,

00:00:42:22 – 00:01:07:20
Doreen
Yeah, which is scary because neither one of us won. These sweaters, you’d be like, really? You didn’t win. But, we did not plan on having similar sweaters. But we do. Yes. It’s not very clear whether or not exactly alike, but they are similar. But you. Right after I ordered mine and not knowing what I got. How cute.

00:01:07:22 – 00:01:31:06
Doreen
That’s. So what else is new? Well, the holidays are always a stressful time. Yeah, they’re a great time. They’re a fun time. They’re like, I love the holidays. But there is that side to the holidays. Even without divorce, right? Without starting over, without all that and that. Just hurts. Yeah. Well, before we get into that, though, let’s talk about our holidays, because I’m pretty excited about our trip.

00:01:31:08 – 00:01:54:18
Jeff
We’re going to Charleston. Yeah, the sea family. Well, this is the first time I know that I have not had the family here for Christmas. I know, and you know, we do a big thing. We do the Christmas Eve with the foreign oceans and the wild rice. And then we do the Christmas casserole, and then we do the prime rib and the Yorkshire pudding and all the things the next day.

00:01:54:18 – 00:02:22:22
Doreen
And and, don’t forget the real Christmas tree that we obviously, you know, we always remember what the holidays really are about as well. And, you know, all that. But this year, the girls and, we, we talked in the past couple of, episodes that, Samantha has moved with her boyfriend to Charleston. So we decided to throw everything at her, and we’re coming to see you in Charleston.

00:02:22:23 – 00:02:59:07
Doreen
We’re going to come to her new apartment and your bedroom. Oh, it’ll be fun. It’ll be amazing. But what’s so interesting about that? And let’s first say that Hanukkah this year is on the same day, right as Christmas. So what is so interesting to our listeners? Well, what’s interesting to our listeners is everything that we talk about. But of course, you know, Jewish without a Jewish last name, you’re not Jewish with a Jewish last name because Sam is Jewish as well, and the girls are Jewish.

00:02:59:07 – 00:03:22:15
Jeff
So we’re a blend. They have their baby naming. Yes, we have their. You go and we’ve I’ve been bar mitzvahed and they’ve been by mitzvot. And so, it’s a conglomeration of all kinds of joy and love and we’re just really excited about all of us. Even Sam and his girl forgotten to get married together. You, when you went off into the weeds a little bit.

00:03:22:17 – 00:03:44:03
Doreen
Well, I just want to give everybody the kind of the, the gamut of what’s going on between celebration, which holiday. Yeah. But really, what I, you know, what I was going to talk about. I do not know how to read this. Very interesting. And that’s great. Which is we can talk a little bit about how we have blended our religions and our traditions.

00:03:44:03 – 00:04:08:20
Doreen
You being Jewish, right, Sam being Jewish, the girls being, you know, Jewish in the sense of having a baby, naming their bat mitzvah. But, but always celebrating Christmas because that was always big for me. And I didn’t convert. So, you know, they they had involved themselves in both religious traditions and the celebration of Christmas and Hanukkah and all that.

00:04:08:20 – 00:04:36:02
Doreen
But. So we’re going up to Charleston. But Sam is coming as well, of course, because when we mentioned that we wanted to consider going up there since all the girls are up in Alabama, North Carolina and South Carolina, they said, of course, well, Hanukkah is the same day as Christmas. And I said, well, invite your dad. And so he’s coming and we’re all staying at some resort in Mount Pleasant.

00:04:36:04 – 00:05:04:01
Doreen
We’ll let you know about it. And that’s it. So you can have what I’m saying is, you know, your ex is is the way can be. And I know everybody’s out there going, but you don’t know my ex. If you knew my ex, right, I know I get it. Well, you’ve been divorced for many years, and, but you know that that’s that really doesn’t have anything to do with it because you’ve always been that way with Sam, and I’ve been that way with Sam.

00:05:04:01 – 00:05:28:20
Jeff
And I think it would be. It wouldn’t be the holidays without him. You know what? It’s always. It’s always, like, comfortable. Yeah. I’m saying at least for me. Right? I always feel like it’s just really comfortable. And I think it’s great for the girls. I mean, that’s and why not? I mean, it’s it’s about that too, you know, it’s about that’s why, you know, they they are the glue.

00:05:29:00 – 00:05:57:09
Doreen
They are the glue that keeps us all together. You know, and and that’s welcomed. And it’s a beautiful thing. And it’s really something that I think is, a blessing. Right, right. And, and the reason we’re talking about this topic on this episode, right before the holidays, is we know that some of you out there, may not find it so easy, may find it to be difficult in your thoughts.

00:05:57:11 – 00:06:21:07
Jeff
Difficult in what you’re, experiencing where, like you’re saying. Oh, you don’t know my ex. We’ll give it time. And, you know, when we heal and everything, but I think that, it’s a it’s a good subject to discuss. Well, let’s discuss, but for those that are watching the video, I mean, do you want to say anything about your new haircut?

00:06:21:09 – 00:06:46:17
Doreen
I’m looking over at you with your green sweater on with your little, ornaments all over them. But I’m also looking at your new haircut. Well, it’s not a new haircut. It’s not a new hairstyle. I had, deep brain stimulation surgery, which, you know, people here, brain surgery. And it’s is really amazing. You go in the next day and.

00:06:46:19 – 00:07:19:06
Jeff
Yeah, you know, it’s it’s very, technologically, out there, but, they put little probes in your brain, electric probes, and they give you the shock, you know, so the tremors stop and. Oh, wait, you didn’t tell people why you had brain surgery? Well, I have Parkinson’s, and most people have heard that before, but I guess if you’re a new listener, you know, I have Parkinson’s and a little tremor here in the left hand, and, I like to say is that we have Parkinson’s, too, because it’s really a family thing.

00:07:19:08 – 00:07:45:20
Doreen
Well, that’s an understatement. No, you have it. Yes. Like we are dealing with it. And I’ll be honest with you. I mean, most of the time we don’t think about it. I know, at least for me, I know you do more. Obviously you’re dealing with the physical aspects of it, but, you know, it’s you deal with what life brings you and some things you have choices on and some you don’t.

00:07:45:20 – 00:08:05:14
Doreen
And this is one of those things that God decided that we had to deal with. And we are. But yeah, you had surgery and knock on wood, everything went really well. Now we’re just waiting for them to turn on you. Turn on the battery, you need device. You like the bionic man over there? We’re going to. We’re going to see what else we can tweak with that device.

00:08:05:14 – 00:08:43:08
Doreen
I have a secret conversation going on with the programmers. You don’t know about this? No. Okay. We’re not leave the house clean. Go say yes to anything that you said you. But in all seriousness, too, when you talk about we have Parkinson’s. You know, I know this is a lot for you to take on as well. Yeah. And, you know, it’s it’s something for you to, to really have to dive into and say, this is, something that we have to deal with because there’s a lot of things that you have to deal with, too, you know?

00:08:43:08 – 00:09:08:10
Doreen
So, I’m glad you said that. You. That’s true. I was, I went to yoga this morning, and, 6 or 6 a.m. class, and there was this grumpy gentleman there, older gentleman. And I’ll say it is definitely, you know, 67 days, whatever. Oh, yeah. But, he was just crappy, and I was like, you’re in this put.

00:09:08:11 – 00:09:33:01
Doreen
I was thinking to myself, you were in a place of Zen. We’re going to do yoga. It’s a flow yoga. It’s of the now. So it’s heated. It’s very nice. How did you know he was grumpy? Because he said something? Not to me specifically. He was complaining about his his position on the floor. Meaning? Because they give you a number and and you got to go and put your mat by the number, okay.

00:09:33:05 – 00:09:54:03
Doreen
So that they have enough. It is organized. That’s great. Well it’s very it’s crowded and they’re not going to suggest it’s not. You definitely are right up next to your neighbor. But he was complaining about his number and I said, well, you know what? I know I’ve had those numbers before, but you know what? We were here, we woke up and we’re doing yoga.

00:09:54:05 – 00:10:00:12
Doreen
You know, this is beautiful. And, anyhow, he left the class early.

00:10:00:12 – 00:10:31:17
Doreen
And, I guess I don’t know how it Monday. Well, you think about it. Well, we talk about coaching. We talk about our thoughts, create our feelings that create our actions and our results in our lives. And we can always think of some people or somebody or some situation that’s worse off than we are, especially around the holidays, because a lot of people have it a lot worse off than we do when it comes to the holidays.

00:10:31:19 – 00:10:57:09
Doreen
Oh, yeah. And and, you know, the thing is, do you want to stay in that bad mood, especially around the holidays? Right. Whatever it is, whatever you’re dealing with, do you want to stay in this negative space or how do you get out of that and into a positive space? And it’s, you know, it’s challenging. I’m not going to suggest it’s not when you’re trying to figure out, you know, co-parenting during the holidays.

00:10:57:09 – 00:11:19:00
Doreen
I mean, that’s really what we’re talking about, because if you don’t have children together, it’s pretty much a no brainer, right? Go your separate ways and that’s it. I mean, maybe it causes some difficulty with families who throughout the years have gotten close, you know, and things like this. And I, I know people that are divorced, don’t have children and still celebrate on some level because the families don’t feel connected.

00:11:19:00 – 00:11:40:05
Doreen
Right? Right. But for most of our listeners, this is about the children. Well, how do we make it? How do we make it as comfortable for them and for us to make it enjoyable? Right, right. So it’s hard, but your thoughts create your feelings. Actions result. Right. So you can have a thought that this is going to be horrible.

00:11:40:05 – 00:12:01:00
Doreen
And I got to share time. And you know, this is I usually have the entire Christmas or the entire Hanukkah or whatever it is. And now you don’t. You got to share it. Or you can think, look, they get to experiences. They get to embrace whatever new tradition or family tradition one side has, and now they get to embrace the other.

00:12:01:00 – 00:12:23:00
Doreen
Tradition. And they get the best of both worlds, you know, and they get to have all these experiences or you or you can bury the hatchet, so to speak. Literally, bury the hatchet and, and still have your holidays together. Yeah. But, you know, that takes two. It takes two and it takes time. You can do a lot of things.

00:12:23:00 – 00:12:47:04
Doreen
But the question is, would the other side want to do it? I think one of the things we wanted to recommend is ask, ask. So many people think maybe it’s weird to like, invite your ex over for Christmas, but you know what? I didn’t think it was so weird. We invited Sam over for Christmas. Often we thought it was weird if we didn’t ask him.

00:12:47:04 – 00:13:20:09
Doreen
Yeah, again, it’s it’s about the kids. Yeah, it’s about that. So, you know, if you don’t ask, you’re not going to get. So you might as well take the opportunity to at least inquire, you know, and I and I think that no matter what the answer is, you can still start creating new traditions, new experiences and new holidays that, you know, maybe, say, in your case, Sam had the kids for Hanukkah, you had the kids for Christmas.

00:13:20:11 – 00:13:49:10
Jeff
Or maybe you celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve. Yeah. And then Christmas on Christmas Day. I mean, so there’s there’s some new traditions that you can develop, right? Don’t don’t be so close minded that it has to stay the same right as it’s been. I think the important thing in coaching is to recognize that the past is the past, and that it will change, and to embrace that and don’t dwell on the past.

00:13:49:10 – 00:14:08:16
Doreen
The negative of it. Right. Oh, this isn’t going to be good. Let’s focus again on those thoughts that are going to create the results we want, which what we really want is to enjoy our holidays, right? So to have the thoughts we have to say let the past go, embrace that what it was. And now let’s create something new.

00:14:08:16 – 00:14:27:17
Doreen
And I think it would be really cool to invite the kids in on that if they’re old enough, or even not to say, you know what, we want to come up with some new traditions. Let’s all think about it, you know, let’s make a game out of it. Like everybody put down what they think on paper and we’ll open it up and we won’t say who it’s from.

00:14:27:17 – 00:14:47:23
Doreen
And we get to guess who made that tradition right? It would be a fun game. Yeah. Well, it’s, you know, the only thing constant in life is change, right? So if that’s the case, you know, things are going to change. Embrace it. You know, embrace the change that it’s going to come no matter what happens. Right. And and I like that.

00:14:47:23 – 00:15:18:18
Doreen
Make a game of it or, you know, come up with some fun ideas okay. Yeah. Yeah. So what’s next I don’t know. Well I think that one thing that is very, very important, very, very is you. I know you’re going to say I say anything. You said it for me. Well, you know, you if you’re expecting the holidays to be kind of a bummer or you’re expecting it to be different, maybe start focusing on some self-care.

00:15:18:20 – 00:15:46:00
Jeff
Maybe you start doing some reading, doing some going to yoga, meditation. Start focusing on going to the gym or whatever it is. Start focusing on yourself and taking care of yourself, and then decide what kind of thoughts do I want to have? Yeah, but just this episode dropping on the 16th of December. Yes. We don’t have to any time taking care, but don’t you remember how it was during the holidays?

00:15:46:00 – 00:16:04:21
Doreen
It’s pretty busy. I mean CC yeah. What does CC stand for, honey, you know, Samantha has been helping us with some editing and things. And, you know, as she just got out of school and she’s looking for a great marketing job. If anybody knows that she’s working for us, she didn’t see it. She’s going to probably be touching this video, of course.

00:16:04:21 – 00:16:25:21
Doreen
And, you know, looking at the podcast or listening to it. But CC is Christmas crazy, which I went right every year. But no, no. Come on. So yeah, it’s great to take some self-care. I think what you can do now is, yeah, it’s this is dropping on the 16th, but we only have less than ten days, you know, what is it, nine days, right is take some time.

00:16:25:21 – 00:16:45:16
Doreen
So I think timeouts right. You know what I’m saying. When you need to, when you’re feeling that stress, when you’re feeling I can feel it. I was feeling it before I started the video today. I came from a full day at my office as a, you know, my lawyer office. And it was a tough it was a it was not a tough day.

00:16:45:16 – 00:17:08:18
Doreen
It was a very packed day with appointments and meetings and all the things. Right. And things I had to review and get out. It was due to them and I was, and I feel the stress like it’s it’s in my throat and it’s almost like in my head, like it feels like it’s strangling, almost like it’s hard to breathe.

00:17:08:20 – 00:17:40:00
Doreen
And I just came in and when I took them up, I just took a moment. I just took a moment to like, just, you know, sit down and share lights off and just sit there and just basically meditate for five minutes, okay? And don’t you see the difference? I do from when I first came? Yes. But what I’m saying is, yeah, I think it would be great to take some self-care moment boundaries.

00:17:40:00 – 00:18:18:23
Doreen
Now let’s think about the people out there that don’t have the same relationship, which is everybody else, which is probably people including would have been you, you. Oh, it’s definitely me. But when are you setting boundaries? But let’s talk about that, okay. I think, you know, I was just talking to a client today about this, you have to if you can agree on some changes in your holiday schedule, this is your parenting plan or visitation schedule that accommodate what’s going on in both families, because usually that’s what’s needed, right?

00:18:19:00 – 00:18:40:02
Doreen
The agreement will say, hey, you’re going to pick up the kids here and here and do all this, but then, you know, family comes. It just needs to be flexible. In most families. I think that most parents, they use the agreement as a backup, and they really try to figure it out otherwise. Right. I really see that. So this gentleman, this client of ours is like, yeah, she’s not budging.

00:18:40:04 – 00:19:12:05
Doreen
You know, they’re trying to work out some plans for the holidays. And I’m like, then you’re left with the agreement and you’re left with the agreement because the agreement is there in writing to give you a set of parameters when you can’t agree. And they’ve exhausted the possibility of agreement, and now it’s becoming an argument. Right. But you know, like but if you know, you’re not seeing my point and all the things I’m like, stop it, it’s the holidays, you need to finalize your plans, just go with the agreement.

00:19:12:07 – 00:19:31:18
Doreen
If it says you got even though your family wants to come an hour before you’re going to have the kids tell your family that you got to move it back. Just be honest. I’m sorry. My agreement has the kids at 6:00, not five. So why don’t you guys come over at 630? I mean, it is what it is.

00:19:31:19 – 00:20:02:11
Jeff
Or if you’re willing to bend a little bit, you know, I will do this. Provided you do that. You’ve already done that. Okay. But I’m just saying, for those that haven’t, right. Try to set up a compromise with a boundary. But if you’re late, you know, whenever you have that boundary. Absolutely. But for those that can’t get to some agreement and you’ve made the the try several times, and even if it starts to get heated, it’s better to just say, let’s go back to the agreement and just everything else just has to work within that.

00:20:02:13 – 00:20:21:06
Doreen
That’s why when you draft these parenting plans, these visitation plans are so important that you think not only of the moment, you know what I’m saying? Like what’s going on in your life today? But you gotta think about the future. What are the holidays going to look like? What do I want as far as a time sharing during the holidays?

00:20:21:06 – 00:20:44:07
Jeff
Summer? What happens with summer vacations? What about if I want to go to Europe or he wants to take the kids to Europe? Like, do I know who’s holding the passports? What’s going to happen with that? Because that’s very that’s an issue when people somebody has the passport. You got to think it a parenting plan. I know people don’t think about this stuff, but what happens if I want to go on a trip?

00:20:44:07 – 00:21:05:06
Doreen
There’s a mechanism and the drafting, give notice and writing. Get it, get it within next Monday and it’s enforceable by a court order. So you got to think of all the things what happens when the kids get older. The schedules may be different. Now. You have to pick up at 730 on at my client today, 730 on a Saturday morning.

00:21:05:07 – 00:21:27:07
Doreen
You’re not getting any teenager up at 730 in the morning. So if you have that in your agreement and the kid’s five, that’s great. But let me tell you something. When they’re 15, that ain’t happening. So think about it like there’s got it. You know, that’s why lawyers get paid good dollars. We’re supposed to prospectively be thinking about all these things and reminding you.

00:21:27:09 – 00:21:51:22
Doreen
So look at your agreements. I would definitely go there if you need to. Well, let’s let’s get back into boundaries because when we didn’t really what we were doing and we didn’t really talk about boundaries because, you know, sometimes when you’re dealing with friends and or associates at work, you know, there’s boundaries that you want to set. Say, I don’t want to talk about the, you know, the marriage or I don’t want to don’t bring up my divorce or I’m going to have to leave or that kind of.

00:21:51:22 – 00:22:18:16
Jeff
So, you know, there’s some boundaries that you want to talk about. What do you do? I keep showing you to look at the good, the camera movement. But there’s a few that are listening because you’re looking at me like, look over there. They can’t take their eyes off of you anyway. Oh, you’re so sweet. But you definitely want to have a plan to, to implement with people that you’re my associate during the holidays.

00:22:18:17 – 00:22:36:19
Doreen
I’m very confused. What are you talking about? In other words, let’s say you’re going to a party. Yes. Okay. And you don’t want, you know, the ex to be brought up or invited. Okay. You know, if you take off the children sharing for the holidays and we’re going on to some different stuff. Yeah. I’m just giving an example of what a boundary might.

00:22:36:19 – 00:23:02:19
Jeff
You set it up for us okay. Let’s assume that. So assume that you have mutual friends okay. Thank you for laying the foundation. We call it okay. Mutual friends because I had no idea what you’re talking about. I just want you to know, okay? And you preferred that your ex maybe not be invited. So in other words, you shared friends.

00:23:02:19 – 00:23:22:15
Jeff
Shared friends. And there’s holiday parties. There’s holiday parties, and you want to go to a holiday party that your ex might be at, might be at, we don’t know. So maybe, invite him for the first half of the party and you’re invited to the second half of the. Oh, so you’re throwing the party? Yes. Well, you’re setting you’re setting a boundary with the friend that’s throwing the party.

00:23:22:15 – 00:23:51:16
Doreen
Wait wait wait wait, stop. You’re telling me that you think that someone who got divorced should go to their friend and tell their friend to invite her for part and him for part? I would not recommend. Well, I wouldn’t do. That is a big. And what? What I mean is. Okay, well, give me an example of a boundary with somebody that, you know, you you’re a friend.

00:23:51:22 – 00:24:13:11
Doreen
It’s very simple. Go ahead. This is how it goes. Same scenario. Same scenario okay. You have mutual friends that are throwing a party, and you are divorced now, and you don’t want to be at the same party with your ex. Okay? Okay. All you have to do is say to your friend, I understand that you did you invite so-and-so?

00:24:13:11 – 00:24:46:00
Doreen
I was wondering if you invited my ex to the party. Okay, okay. Because that’s a normal question that a friend could ask another friend. Nothing weird there, right? Right. Okay. And if she says yes, then you could say, could you do me a favor? And then she’ll say, yes. Yes. And the favor would be, listen, I would like to come to the party as well, but I’m wondering if I could come for a certain period of time, maybe a little earlier, or I’ll stay later.

00:24:46:02 – 00:25:05:14
Doreen
And it. And so that I don’t have to spend time necessarily with him. And when he comes, I’ll be cordial and nice, but I’ll just I’ll just exit. It has nothing to do with you. I just would prefer not to be in the same party. Okay. That way I get to control when I leave. Okay, great example of a boundary.

00:25:05:14 – 00:25:25:08
Doreen
Thank you. No, but seriously, because I think if you ask your friend to kind of like, could you invite him to come only for the like, tell him that sex that it really starts at four. Okay. Those kind of those kind of tricks we only do with, like, Spencer, our son. We tell him that some things at four, even though it’s at five because we know it’s going to be an hour late, right, right, right.

00:25:25:10 – 00:25:39:20
Doreen
But no, seriously, I wouldn’t involve the friends that way. I get it, though. I mean, I guess if you’re close enough with somebody, you might want to, but I don’t know, that borders to me. I kind of like not being truthful, and I just I don’t like that. You know how I am. I just like being super transparent.

00:25:40:02 – 00:26:12:02
Doreen
I’d rather just say, listen, I’ll come. And if he shows up, you know, maybe go, you know, I’ll just leave. But it has something to do with you. I just want to come by and say hi and have a. I’ll just stay for a little while, okay? Right. Yes. How’s that for a boundary? It’s great. Okay. Okay. The other boundary I was going to say is, with your ex, I think it’s more of enforcing, again, the, the parenting plan if you need to, but, are there any boundaries between.

00:26:12:04 – 00:26:35:10
Doreen
You know, the co-parents that we should address? I mean, I think I, I don’t think they’re really boundaries. I think they’re more like understandings, like, it’s it’s nice to talk about presence. Yeah. You know, should we buy presents together? Budgeting. Budgeting for presents? Yeah. Sometimes a lot of families like to buy gifts for their children, especially as they get older.

00:26:35:10 – 00:26:54:10
Doreen
That like a computer. It’s a rather expensive gift. And it’s needed by the child for school. But they also want it because they enjoy computers. So it’s like you’re going to get them a computer anyhow. So maybe you could ask your ex, would you like to go and have house with me on the computer? But those types of things, I’m just being smart about those things.

00:26:54:11 – 00:27:18:10
Doreen
You know. Exactly, exactly. Also things like, I know that at least for us, I used to ask the kids, would they want to get something for dad? You know, when they’re little and you buy presents and, you know, presents for them? Yeah. And they get all excited about buying presents for the family. So I always thought it was appropriate to say, would you like, you know, here’s, here’s X amount of dollars, spend it.

00:27:18:10 – 00:27:45:11
Doreen
However you want, including anything you want to get for daddy. Right? Right. So I think that’s a nice thing to do. Integrating with the kids. What else? Well, I think that, you know, staying busy for the holidays is very important. Whether you volunteer at a, at a shelter or a food giveaway or something like that, you want to stay busy, and it kind of makes you feel good about yourself and that you’re staying around.

00:27:45:11 – 00:28:06:22
Doreen
You’re you’re surrounding yourself with people. But I think less fortunate than you are. I think you have to promise it again, talking about people sometimes during the holidays, they have the opposite problem of not being too busy at their own. You went in, you jumped into it and you jumped into it about volunteering and being around other people.

00:28:06:22 – 00:28:24:18
Doreen
And I think that we need to premise it by saying there are people that get divorced and they’re alone, right? They don’t have extended family. They aren’t. Maybe they were all caught up in their marriage, meaning that was a social life and a lonely yes. Yeah, I bring it up and you preface it. What, the other way around.

00:28:24:18 – 00:28:45:12
Doreen
But I think it’s important that if you are lonely during this time, that would be a beautiful thing to do. There are so many amazing foundations right now and various charities that are looking for help, especially during the holidays. And I think it always feels good. Exactly what I meant by making yourself and being a little bit selfish and having yourself.

00:28:45:13 – 00:29:04:06
Jeff
Well, I don’t really have it as bad as I feel like I have it because there’s so many people around me, but there’s worse than I do. That’s the feeling you might get after it. Well, that’s what I’m saying. I understand there’s a purpose, you know, for doing manor for Mars and women are from Venus because you want to jump right to the conclusion.

00:29:04:06 – 00:29:27:00
Doreen
And I’m trying to, like, lead our, our listeners and do it. Okay. Yeah. It’s going to make you feel good. Feel good. Well, let’s first talk about why they might not. But you don’t have to be lonely to do something like this. You don’t have to be alone to go out and volunteer to help people. You know? I know it is something that makes you feel good for sure, you know?

00:29:27:03 – 00:29:50:18
Doreen
All right, well, I think we have given some tips. Yes. You know, you know, I, I just want to say happy holidays to everybody out there. I want to thank you to all of our listeners and everybody who is, contribute to our Life After Divorce Coaching podcast. And, I’m looking forward to talking to you next year.

00:29:50:23 – 00:30:13:13
Doreen
And I also wanted to just throw it out there all, so that y’all for family Group in Boca Raton. We support this podcast, of course. And, we are very aware that a lot of people in the month of January look at their relationships and wonder in the new year, don’t look at me like that. You’ll be getting like that.

00:30:13:13 – 00:30:36:10
Doreen
Resolutions and all the things you know. But seriously, consultations do rise in the month of January. They do things about divorce. So look at your seeking a consultation in Florida and you are interested in learning more about what we do. We do give out complimentary consultations, especially during the month of January. Come talk to us. We’ll figure out how to get you through.

00:30:36:10 – 00:30:57:15
Doreen
We have various processes, everything from litigation, of course. Board certified as a full litigator, here in Florida. But also we have split up services, which is, contested divorce service, which really gets you through quick and easy with a lawyer at a very, very reasonable price. And then we do other things in between, like limited representation.

00:30:57:15 – 00:31:18:10
Doreen
So it’s not a one size fits all. So many people are afraid to talk to a lawyer and they think they’re all expensive. It doesn’t have to be that way. There are options and we’re very creative because I get that there’s different budgets and different needs. So come visit us at your local family law. Just look us up and, you can book a free consultation.

00:31:18:14 – 00:31:38:03
Jeff
Knowledge is power. Which is actually, I heard a saying the other day that knowledge is empower. Implement of the knowledge is power. You know what? That’s so true. And don’t get me started on that, because I can really get into that one. Talk about that in another podcast. All right. Happy holidays. We’ll see you next year. The holidays.

00:31:38:03 – 00:32:03:21